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A Charlie Sheen Christmas: "Now I have a machine gun. Ho, ho, ho"



Charlie-sheen Remember the news a couple days ago about Charlie Sheen's arrest in Colorado on Christmas Day for a drunken fight with his wife? Turns out the real reason he's in trouble is because he allegedly used a weapon.

No, probably not a machine gun. And probably not the gun he used in Platoon either. I'm guessing it was a spork. Those suckers are dangerous. I gave myself a serious scratch with one while eating at Taco Bell last week. Almost drew blood.

(Update: It was a knife. Should I make the obligatory "bringing a knife to a gun fight like from Untouchables?)

Here's what the Associated Press says: "Authorities say actor Charlie Sheen is accused of using a weapon in an alleged case of domestic violence in Aspen. ... Police spokeswoman Stephanie Dasaro did not provide details on what kind of weapon Sheen is accused of using."


5. "Somebody once wrote: 'Hell is the impossibility of reason.' That's what this place feels like. Hell."

4. "The village, which had stood for maybe a thousand years, didn't know we were coming that day. If they had, they would've run."

3. "The proof is in the eyes, when you know you know."

2. "She's a f---ing human being, man."

1. "I think now, looking back, we did not fight the enemy; we fought ourselves. The enemy was in us."

[Last modified: Wednesday, June 9, 2010 2:54pm]


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