Soon to be my hardcover bestselling novel, featuring proven truths such as:

-- Give a girl your heart, she'll give you a pen. (Say Anything)

-- The best defense is a good offense (Hot Pursuit)

-- If I show up at your door, chances are you did something to bring me there. (Gross Pointe Blank)

-- Go that way really fast. If something gets in your way ... turn. (Better Off Dead)

-- I've been listening to my gut since I was 14 years old, and frankly speaking, I've come to the conclusion that my guts have *&^# for brains. (High Fidelity)

-- To hold on to sanity too tight is insane. (Pushing Tin)

-- We may not always get what we want. We may not always get what we need. Just so's we don't get what we deserve. (True Colors)

-- Freedom, choices, possibilities. That's what I'm about. (Tapeheads)

-- What the hell's wrong with being stupid once in awhile? Does everything you do always have to be sensible? (The Sure Thing)