Falling stars of the 80s
Madonna masquerading as a stripper. Gary Coleman on "Divorce Court." George Michaels cruising the public park bathrooms. Mel Gibson picking fights with the police -- and his liver. Tom Cruise picking fights with -- pretty much the entire civilized world. And let's not even bring up the sins of Pee Wee Herman and Jeffrey Jones.
It's an ugly world out there sometimes, 80s fans.
This is a list I'd hoped we wouldn't have to put together, but the timing seems appropriate. Tell us this: Who are the '80s stars you're most ashamed of these days?
You could make your picks based on problems with the law, substance abuse, fights with other celebs or just really bad cosmetic surgery decisions. Submit as many as you want, but try to rank them whenever possible. Later, we'll unveil the ultimate Hall of Shame list.
Here are some others that come to mind:
MADONNA: She's 49 years old, going on 19. And she still wants to dress like a peep-show girl turned dominatrix. And puleeze! For all that is holy, stop talking with a British accent.
SEAN YOUNG: The glory days are all over for the co-star of "No Way Out," "Cousins" and "Blade Runner." She needs to use a breath-a-lizer now before attending awards dinners.
TOM CRUISE: Yo, Tom, you only "starred" in a movie about Vietnam. So stop acting like you have some battleground syndrome and act like a normal person again. Or at least take your shoes if you want to jump on couches.
PAULA ABDUL: I really don't want to be a cold-hearted snake here. I feel for Paula -- I can't make it through an episode of "American Idol" without drinking heavily either.