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If we must remake every Patrick Swayze movie, start with these 5



roadhouse2-300x191.jpgHollywood seems obsessed with remaking every possible movie by the late Patrick Swayze, as correctly pointed out by Entertainment Weekly today (and reinforced by news of a Point Break remake in the works). While we await the disastrous modern takes on Red Dawn, Dirty Dancing and a musical based on Ghost, here are five Swayze movies that BEG to be remade.


YOUNGBLOOD (1986): Outside of 1977's Slap Shot, the world isn't full of many great hockey movies. I'm not saying Youngblood, which starred Rob Lowe as a pansy American hockey phenom who befriends Swayze as a mentor, is great. But it's a lot better than any of the Mighty Ducks flicks. Signature Swayze line: "Thank God there is a sport for middle-sized white boys."

THE OUTSIDERS (1983): I know there's a lot of love for this movie and the book it's based on. But so many stars were criminally underutilized -- Tom Cruise, Emilio Estevez and yes, Patrick Swayze -- that a remake just seems fair.

UNCOMMON VALOR (1983): Gene Hackman leads a band of Vietnam vets back to 'Nam to find his son. Along with them comes Swayze, who lost his dad there as well. Think The A-Team meets Rambo meets Saving Private Ryan. Easily adaptable to any of today's nightmarish never-ending wars.

GRANDVIEW U.S.A. (1984): Like Youngblood, this movie escaped any box office records. The small-town tale was supposed to make a star out of C. Thomas Howell, but Swayze -- as Ernie "Slam" Webster -- scored all the best lines. "Boy, you just discover the oldest sexual position in the book: the Foolish position."

ROAD HOUSE (1989): Forget Johnny Castle and Dirty Dancing, the role of Dalton might be Swayze's most epic movie character. He was more a wise sage than bar bouncer: "Pain don't hurt" ... "Nobody ever wins a fight" ... "You're too stupid to have a good time." Surely, the brand-dead heads in Hollywood can write up another dozen or so more classic quotes and Road House can open for business again. This time, just make sure Dalton is bigger.

[Last modified: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 4:10pm]


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