Prepare to have childhood memories crushed: 'G.I. Joe' could be year's worst movie
Do you still have nightmares seeing Dolph Ludgren as "He-Man" in 1987's Masters of the Universe? Get ready for more sleepless nights because the word in Hollywood is that the big-screen version of '80s cartoon G.I. Joe is the runaway contender for worst movie of 2009.
The website io9.com called G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra "Showgirls meets Plan 9." That's seriously brilliant commentary.
"We're all expecting G.I. Joe to be one of the worst movies of all time -- but we were actually overestimating it," the blog says. "Judging from the novelization, G.I. Joe will be a masterpiece of badness."
The movie opens Aug. 7. Check the official website for trailers and more hype. If you can stomach it.
Not everyone, though agrees with the doomsayers. Comicbookmovie.com actually gives it a lukewarm review -- damn near a glowing one compared to others.
"I've been familiar with G.I. Joe since I was a kid. I remember the cartoon, the silly PSAs and, of course, the toys. However, I was never a die hard fan or anything like that. After seeing the trailers, and realizing it looked pretty much nothing like the G.I.Joe I remember, I wasn't expecting much," writes its reviewer. "So, with that said, here's the short version: It wasn't great, but it wasn't the train wreck I expected. Also, it was more enjoyable than Transformers 2."
Of course, that's like saying Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom was better than Kingdom of the Crystal Skull!