Run, Katie, run! (Or at least waddle away quickly)
Tom Cruise's mansion in Beverly Hills is being plastered with huge posters that remind his pregnant "fiancee" Katie Holmes to be silent -- "Be silent and make all physical movements slow and understandable" -- during the birth of her first child.
(Waiting for the punchline? Sadly, there isn't one.)
Celeb news websites report today that Scientologists have been spotted bringing the signs -- some up to 6-feet high -- into the home because their faith tells them that any verbal sounds by the mother (or attending visitors) can be destructive to the newborn and require years of deprogramming to overcome.
In his defense (since no one else is rushing to it), Cruise says the practice is misunderstood. As long as Holmes is "calm and quiet," he's happy. Whatever, guy. Ice Man was right. You are dangerous.
Obligatory nice thing to say about Cruise
Loony Tune Tom has taken his lumps in this blog over the last few months. (Here, here, here and here). So we try to include some nice things too. .... Thinking .... Still thinking ... OK! Found something.
Everything I Need To Know In Life I Learned From a Tom Cruise movie:
-- "College women can smell ignorance ... like dog s--t" (Risky Business)
-- "If you think, you're dead." (Top Gun)
-- "Life is just one long night with a few comatose daylight hours." (Cocktail)
-- "All airlines have crashed at one time or another, that doesn't mean that they are not safe." (Rain Man)
-- "All Chests are equal in the eyes of God." (Far and Away)
-- "You don't need a patch on your arm to have honor." (A Few Good Men)
-- "Your body's dying. Pay no attention, It happens to us all." (Interview with The Vampire)
-- "No dream is ever just a dream." (Eyes Wide Shut)
-- "Even in my dreams, I'm an idiot who knows he's about to wake up to reality." (Vanilla Sky)