My friend Dave Davisson (now, Dave, can you fill us in on your parents' thinking there?) got to go out to eat with Brian Ries ("Lucky!"--spoken like a peevish Napoleon Dynamite). He's embarking on a great quest for the Tampa Bay area's best hamburger. Here is his list. I gave him a very random handful of ideas, as have other eager carnivores, evidently. I think it's a noble cause, especially if he's going to be quasi-scientific about it and eschew cheese and other fripperies in the name of The Cause. Dave, does this mean no catsup? Mayo, salt, etc.? This means you gotta eat it as God intended (or whoever)?

Actually, I think that's kind of a reasonable critic's credo: you've got to eat it as the kitchen intended. No substitutions, no amendments, no whining. It comes out and you receive.

That's an aside, really. The subject here is burgers. Who's got them, who doesn't. Discuss.