The Emmys are cool and everything...

But come on. When you pile into your sofa Sunday for that pre-show wearing the worst pajamas in history, eating Doritos dipped in marshmallow fluff (we don’t judge), you won’t be looking for directors or casting agents or heavy gold statues with dangerous pointy wings.

You’ll be looking for the clothes.

Phillip Bloch has firsthand insight. He’s a celebrity stylist who has worked with dozens of stars, including Halle Berry, Julianna Margulies, Cheryl Hines, Jenna Elfman, Kristen Johnston and cast members from Mad Man. He’s a celebrity in his own right as a writer, an actor and a television host. He’s a spokesman for Maidenform’s Fat Free Dressing, a line of shapewear tops.

This year, he’s the red carpet host for CNN’s Emmy programming. We caught up with him by phone before the big day, dissecting everything from fattening fabrics to the stars’ secrets for looking slim.

What is it like out there on the red carpet?
It’s very loud and crowded. It’s very hot.

What do you say if someone is wearing something awful?
I always find the positive. “Oh, I love that color! I like the length! Who’s the designer?” You just have to find something positive, and sometimes you dig a little deeper.

Are there things that don’t translate well in photos?
Satins and velvets are definitely hard fabrics to wear. They just really make you look like you’ve got a tummy. It’s all about reflection of light, and they’re harder than most. I think it’s very important to keep the silhouette looking long and lean. I’m not a big fan of the shoe boot, especially with shirts or dresses, because it cuts you in the wrong places. I think my two favorite things are finding the right length of skirt that looks good on your legs, and belts. Belts are great because they define the waist and break up the body in a positive way.

Do stars really look perfect?
I don’t like to destroy the myth, but you’ve got to be real. I’ve always worked with more curvaceous girls in Hollywood — Halle and Salma and Mariah and Jennifer Lopez. All the women, if they’re a size two or a size 12, they all love to slip into their fat-free dressing. A lot of it is mental. I think the shapewear just makes you stand a little taller.It’s really about posture and attitude and feeling confident.

What will we see on the red carpet this year?
Statement necklaces, but then very small earrings. Stacks of bracelets. Jeweled heels on shoes. It’s all about the extra high heels with the little jeweled beading. Everyone wants to look overly opulent. At the end of the day, I think we’re all over this financial hardship stuff and I think people want to get out there and have fun. We all know the regular folks live vicariously through the stars.

~ Deal Diva Stephanie

Photo: Phillip Bloch at a 2009 Anna Sui event, Getty images.