French Elle goes makeup-free. We cry shenanigans.
Without makeup, I look like this:
You do, too. Don't lie. Given these scientific findings, I just can't buy into the latest issue of French Elle. The mag shows eight European celebs supposedly posed makeup free. Here's Eva Herzigova, for example:
Ok, so she doesn't look great. I mean, I'm sure Eva would rather be remembered for some hot, sexy editorial of herself where she's all oiled up and tan and glittery and Photoshopped to the hilt and strewn out on a French beach beside some beefcake dude model. THAT SAID, sisterfriend doesn't look bad, and she certainly doesn't look barefaced. Her skin looks smooth, her lips look all strawberry-hued. She has not a single pore to her name.
My homeskillet Emily first alerted me to this injustice a couple days ago. We analyzed the photos closely, murmuring subtle, intellectual, heady and anthropological remarks like, "COME ON, THAT'S BULL$#*!!"
Final conclusion? "Elle stands for LIES," said Emily in a fit of disgust.
Whatever the truth, I will say that these women are brave to even go this far. If I was ever so graced with the good fortune to be on the cover of French Elle, I would hold the entire staff hostage with a SuperSoaker of boric acid until they airbrushed me to perfection. Then, I'd bind their ankles with hair extensions until they signed legal contracts expressly forbidding the release of the originals.
Check out the photos. What do you think?
~ Deal Diva Stephanie
Photo: Times files, Elle