Worst of Fashion Week: Just ask the models!
Fashion junkies have pointed, laughed and basked in the glow of another season. Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week wraps up Thursday in New York. The event serves as a preview for styles to come in spring 2010.
Honestly, the shows have been pretty awesome. Bold structure, intense color, nice shapes — items you could actually wear on the street without becoming a target for wayward hoagie subs. But not to disappoint, some designers still fed our thirst for crazy. We chatted up a few interesting-looking runway models for the Deal Divas Annual Fashion Week Press Junket. Here’s what they had to say.
Marc Jacobs: “And so I said to Aladdin, 'I’m fed up with your constant late nights with Genie, coming home at 4 a.m. reeking of lamp lighter fluid and stolen apples.’ Then, he tried to give me some line about how I should 'respect the needs of the Sultan’ (like I haven’t heard that one a million times). So I slipped on my harem pants and metallic bustier, grabbed my leather fringe purse and hit the door for a whole new world. I’m DONE with that guy. And by the way... I’ve been hooking up with Jafar for eight years.”
Thom Browne: “I just... I feel like I probably should have listened to my mother. When I packed my bags for the big city, she warned me about New York fashion types. She said they’d only exploit my superior quadriceps. They’d put me in a twee bow tie and competitive tennis skirt. They might even make me wear a mask like Dumb Donald from Fat Albert. She said the worst that could happen to me in the high finance sector is that I could go to jail for life. That would have been better.”
Zac Posen: “It baffles me that I can’t find a husband. What gives? I’m leggy, blond, clearly fierce. But it’s always the same. We hit it off at the door, get along great on the ride to the restaurant. Then, when the coat check clerk takes my trench so I can let my arms breath over the mostaccioli, my date gets all antsy and standoffish and starts asking about my bloodline. I mean, where does someone get off suggesting I’m related to Cookie Monster? That’s racist, right?”
Toni Maticevski: “I’m not really sure of the technical name. My doctor just said 'flesh eating bacteria.’ Basically, what’s happening is, it’s taking over the entire right side of my body, starting at the shoulder and weaving down my leg. I have about two weeks before it totally destroys me. Since there’s nothing they can do, he said I might as well go walk the runway in Fashion Week. Then he did some finger snaps and said, 'Make it work, girl!’ He also declined my insurance.”
Charlotte Ronson: “I’m completely getting fired. But what could I do? Auditions ran soooo late for Eyes Wide Shut, the Musical: a Hilarious Psychoerotic Romp. By the time I got here, there was no time to put on the designer’s actual clothes. Maybe they won’t notice. Or maybe getting fired would be a blessing. What I really want to do is act. Gosh, I hope I get the Nicole Kidman role. Was I flat on the chorus of Fidelio Blues? Golly, I won’t be able to sleep tonight.”
~ Deal Diva Stephanie
Photos: Getty images