The Juice* is not qualified to manage a investment portfolio or anything, but when we heard Brendan Fraser is losing $87,000 per month, we know that’s not a good thing. That cash from The Mummy is only going to last just so long.

Fraser filed documents in a Connecticut court asking to reduce his $50,000 alimony payments to his ex-wife Afton Smith, whom he divorced in 2007. That’s 50 Gs a month, not annually. According to TMZ, the numbers point out to a monthly loss that makes us feel very, very 97 percent about things.

The site says Fraser pulls in $205,704.04 per month, but loses $112,803.25 to business expenses. That leaves him about $92,900.79. Then the report starts getting specific, saying he drops the alimony payment, plus more than $5,000 in mortgages, $6k in property taxes, $34,132.52 in income tax, an additional $25,000 in child support for their three sons, $3,000 for staffing, $5,200 for gardening and even $7.77 for pet care. He must have a boa constrictor that eats one rat a week or something.

The upshot is that he’s claiming he loses the aforementioned $87,320.01 per month (the penny is very important). That sounds like a recipe for disaster, sure, but he is worth about $25 million. By our calculations, he’ll be able to drop that kind of coin for at least another 23 years, so what’s the problem? He should quit whining and continue to pay $5,000 per month in “family support and gifts.”