Anna Nicole Smith gets opera treatment
To anyone who thinks it's America who is bringing down the global culture, consider: The Royal Opera House in London is planning an opera based on the life of Anna Nicole Smith. Get into your fallout shelters ... now.
"It is not going to be tawdry, it is going to be witty, clever, thoughtful and sad," director of opera Elaine Padmore told the U.K.'s Guardian. "It will tell the story of her life, the people who influenced her, her progress," Padmore said. "Clearly the story is about a woman who met an ancient gentleman in a wheelchair, but it's not going to be a straight narrative; choices have been made about significant moments, selecting which incidents in her life are to be built up."
Among the highlights they can choose from are Vickie Lynn Hogan having a son with a coworker at a fried chicken joint in her native Texas, getting a boob job and becoming a pole dancer and model, getting famous in a skin mag and then marrying 89-year-old J. Howard Marshall when she was 26. And we haven't even gotten to the good stuff yet, let alone ODing at 39.
"It is not just a documentary about her, but a parable about celebrity and what it does to people. It can be moving, it can be funny and it tells universal truths about human frailty," Padmore added. "It is a very sad story -- a larger-than-life American story, as was Puccini's Girl of the Golden West. It will be a slice of our times -- of America in the pre-Obama days."
It remains to be seen if we're ready to deal with that past just yet, and especially in this form. It brings a whole new meaning to "when the fat lady sings."