Holly Sampson talked of Tiger Woods affair back in May; Jaimee Grubbs has sexts, apologizes to Elin Nordegren
The sad day has come, dear Juice*heads, where we must go boldly where every media outlet has gone before. Yes, the head Kiwi in charge at tbt* says Tiger Woods is relegated to our daily page. May you all forgive us.
Not that there's a lack of juice to squeeze: First and foremost is the revelation that one of Tiger's alleged mistresses, porn star Holly Sampson, told adult Web site Naughty America way back in May that she'd had a fling with the philandering golfer.
"Me and my girlfriends did a bachelor party for Tiger and it was amazing," she said on the show. "He picked me to go into the room. I have to say he was really good."
Her attorney backed up the remarks, telling Fox411, "Holly Sampson confirms that her relationship with Tiger Woods was intimate and that this relationship occurred while Mr. Woods was not married."
Wait, not officially married? Then what do we care? On to Mistress Zero, 24-year-old Jaimee Grubbs, who shared a bunch of text messages with Tiger that have found their way to Us magazine, like this one from Sept. 27:
Woods: I need you
Grubbs: then get your tight ass over here and visit me! I need u
Woods: I will wear you out soon
Grubbs: how soon? I got a new piercing
Yeah, pretty dull, we know. There's another call and response from Oct. 18 in which Grubbs asks the golfer, "why I keep falling more and more for u ;)", to which Woods replied "because I'm blasian :)." Smooth. Almost as smooth as the way those two allegedly shard holiday greeting on Thanksgiving.
Grubbs did go on Extra to tell Woods' wife, Elin Nordegren, how sorry she was about the whole thing.
"I couldn't describe how remorseful that I am to have hurt her family and her emotionally," Jaimee told Lauren Sanchez (watch it above). But, "If it wasn't me, it was going to be other girls. I did care about him -- I didn't do it for superficial reasons. I didn't do it to purposely hurt her."
That surely makes Elin feel so much better. We feel so much worse, having to sift through this absolute nonsense.