What do we write about for the next 23 days?

Tbdnewparis060507 UPDATED: This is how Paris Hilton’s world ends (temporarily) — not with a bang, but with a whimper. While The Juice* and its fans were tucked soundly away in bed Sunday night, no doubt dreaming of the next big celebrity shakedown, the poor little rich girl quietly turned herself in to the L.A. County Sheriff, TMZ reports.

Ostensibly hoping to avoid the crush of paparazzi buzzing around Hollywood like 13-year cicadas, attorney Richard Hutton picked the heirhead up at her parents’ home at 10:30 p.m. La-La Land time, taking her, mama Kathy and sister Nicky to the Men’s Central Jail downtown. The sheriff brokered the deal to avoid a potential safety hazard, the site reported, opting to have Hilton driven to her real jail in Lynwood after she turned herself in.

Tbdparismug060507 A video on the site shows the Hilton family was very concerned with their golden child being exploited by photographers, since the quartet left with the windows rolled down, and Kathy obviously sitting back far enough so her poor baby could be seen being very distraught and contrite.

“I am ready to face the consequences of violating probation. During the past few weeks, I have had a lot of time to think and have come to realize I made some mistakes,” Hilton said in a statement sent to the site. “This is an important point in my life and I need to take responsibility for my actions. In the future, I plan on taking more of an active role in the decisions I make. I want to thank my family, friends and fans for their continued support. Although I am scared, I am ready to begin my jail sentence.”

Before heading to her 12-by-8, Paris made it sound like her 23-day stint was no big deal, and the big, bad media needs to shove it.

“I did have a choice to go to a pay jail,” Hilton said Sunday, without giving details. “But I declined because I feel like the media portrays me in a way that I’m not and that’s why I wanted to go to county, to show that I can do it and I’m going to be treated like everyone else. I’m going to do the time, I’m going to do it the right way.”

Hilton’s publicist, Elliot Mintz, said he spoke with Kathy Hilton after she returned from the jail, the AP reports.

“She told me it was very emotional,” Mintz said. “She also said that she feels this will be a time when Paris will be able to think and reflect and to spend time alone to learn from the experience because in Paris’ life she’s never alone — there’s always a constant chatter around her.”

Tbdparismtv060507 Paris got quite the sendoff prior to that at the MTV Movie Awards, strolling the red carpet and really not looking too bad at all, until host Sarah Silverman bared her teeth with a raunchy joke at the celebutard’s expense (see video below).

No doubt highly unamused, Paris then left the awards to go to her parents’ home to pay the piper. Although previous reports said Paris had been assigned a hand-picked cellmate, TMZ reports that Hilton will be kept in solitary confinement 23 hours a day, and only let out one hour a day to shower, make phone calls and watch TV in a “small pod adjacent to her cell.”

The scenario conjures images of a celebrity Habitrail, but we can’t help thinking the phone calls will slow once all of Paris’ vacuous hangers-on head for Splitsville.

[Photos: AP]

[Last modified: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 9:13am]

    

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