American Idol Recap: Bee Gees Put the Smackdown on LaKisha and Blake
Those of us who hadn't seen the hunkiest Bee Gee since his days in tight, white disco pants were in for a bit of shock Tuesday, as Gibb tried his hand at coaching the Final Four looking a little like the portrait of Dorian Gray.
Lisping through the worst false teeth work I've ever seen on a celebrity, Gibb tried gamely to help this crew through some of the most difficult tunes to sing in pop music. He wasn't helped much by the bonehead song choices of some finalists -- from Blake's beatbox-fixated take on You Should Be Dancin' to Lakisha's decision to sabotage the soaring chorus on the disco classic Stayin' Alive.
Now, more than any other time on Idol, it's come down to the performances. And Gibb's tunes, filled with memorable melodies in difficult keys with grooves a hair's breadth from hokey, kept the finalists off balance and searching for their Big Vocal Moment. For an amazing story on how they actually choose which songs to sing and how, check out this piece by a longtime pal, USA Today's Bill Keveney.
No surprise that Jordan and Melinda came off best here. I'm violating my own moratorium against predictions to predict that -- if there's any justice -- these two women will face each other for the final crown. They are far and away the best and most versatile singers, with Melinda's amazing vocal prowess offset by Jordan's own considerable talents and spunky beauty.
Blake should be the one heading for the showers this week -- undone by a bit too much confidence in his mouth rhythms and an inability to compete with the Three Divas. If he does go, this will be the first American Idol in which no white people are in the top three -- something that doesn't matter much, since the three women left have clearly been the best singers since the show started. (of course, Dial Idol predicts Blake and Jordin are the sure survivors this week, but their history of inaccuracy is nearly as great as mine)
The only question left now: Which ejected contestant is going to sell more records than all these jamokes put together?