Tampabay.com
NOVEMBER 23, 2009

Parents, park your helicopters

Helicopter Bravo for Time magazine's cover story this week noting the backlash that is growing over "the almost comical overprotectiveness and overinvestment of moms and dads."

"The insurgency goes by many names — slow parenting, simplicity parenting, free-range parenting — but the message is the same: Less is more; hovering is dangerous; failure is fruitful. You really want your children to succeed? Learn when to leave them alone. When you lighten up, they'll fly higher. We're often the ones who hold them down."

*applause applause*

I'm really getting tired of defending the fact that I let my 6 year old walk the dog alone or a 10 year old roam the neighborhood on his bike and just check in now and again, or go a whole season without being signed up for any organized sports. We live in a nice quiet neighborhood, not downtown Tehran, but you'd think I was letting them play in a minefield. In the last 15 years, the crime rate has plunged, but anxiety has skyrocketed. 

Fear of danger is one thing, fear of failure is another. That's where tutors and music lessons and pitching coaches come in.  And that's where an overparenting backlash is also coming from the Slow Parenting Movement, which says it's okay to take a simpler approach to parenting and cut back on all those extra activities and toys. The message: Parents should just chill. It's okay to pay attention to your own needs and back off on the kids. Everyone will be happier.

-- Sharon Kennedy Wynne

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THE AUTHORS

Sharon Kennedy Wynne has sunscreen in her blood. She may have been born in Buffalo but she got here as fast as she could, in time for kindergarten. She grew up in St. Petersburg, graduated from the University of Florida journalism school, and even got married at Sunken Gardens. She's one of the few adults we know who actually loves taking her kids to the beach. She has two sons and with 10 years of parenting under her belt, she's starting to feel a little less out of her league. She comes from a large family and loves to debate, so brace yourself when the hot topics come up.

E-mail Sharon Kennedy Wynne:
wynne@tampabay.com

SP_255665_CROS_KATE.jpgAfter six long years of trying to have a baby, Kate Brassfield was finally able to have one. And then, two minutes later, another one. Suddenly the lady who had never been around babies before was juggling two! Just as Kate felt she was getting pretty good with babies, the girls became toddlers, and now Kate is back to Square One, learning about the care and feeding of these strange, wonderful creatures. She spends her days working part-time from home and trying to keep up with the Twinosaurus Wrecks.

E-mail Kate Brassfield:
katedaphne17@gmail.com

Freelance writer Courtney Cairns Pastor wasn’t so sure about having kids and how she would balance child-rearing with her journalism career. It turned out that her journalism training went to good use. As the mom to a funny, active toddler, she learned to handle him like she did her sources. Never ask yes or no questions (the answer will always be no), get him to be specific (are you crying because you’re wet or your tooth hurts?) and be prepared for anything because no two days are the same. When she’s not playing trucks, Courtney crams for her book club, trains for races and occasionally bursts into showtunes. E-mail her at courtneyblogs@gmail.com.

Suzannah DiMarzio has it bad for the Mouse. Although she grew up outside of Boston, she took her degree in tourism management down to Orlando just to work at Disney and the travel industry. Of course, when she married her high school sweetheart, the reception was at Disney. She’s now a seasoned stay-at-home mom to two tweens and a toddler – and yes, that is as crazy as it sounds. Suzannah has her own blog, ZannaLand.com , and she's a member of the Walt Disney World Moms Panel in addition to being addicted to Twitter, iced coffee, and watching way too much Yo, Gabba Gabba.

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