'Come along or Mom's going to leave you'
Just about everybody has a story of their own parents or they themselves telling a child to cut the crap and come along or they are going to leave them in the store or park. It usually ends with a laugh about the tearful child chasing down the parents and never doing that again. But is this really a good thing to scare a kid like that?
I did something similar to this a couple weeks ago and I feel bad about it and don't think I'll ever do it again. I was at the library recently with an already grumpy 6 year old who said snottily, "No. I'm not going" And I tried a couple times to get him going. But then I said, "Okay you want to live at the library? That's too bad, because I wish you'd come with me. See you."
The car was right outside the library doors and I took my time loading up, fishing for my keys, etc. Finally I closed the doors and started the car and he came running and he had tears in his eyes.
I didn't like that feeling that I had scared him. I really think it was a bad choice on my part. Sure it "worked" but I don't think he should ever for a second believe I'd leave him somewhere.
I think if this ever happens again, I would instead take him to the side of the building, let him have a minute to cool off and then I will let him know that he can either walk to the car and we can go about our day or he will be carried to the car and spend the rest of the day in his room, going to bed early with no privileges. His choice. I know him well enough that it wouldn't come to that. He sometimes has a temper but if you give him a minute and a hug he gets over it.
-- Sharon Kennedy Wynne