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Whoa, Momma!

Sharon Kennedy Wynne, Tracey Henry and Suzannah DiMarzio

Here's a Mother's Day gift: Stop worrying so much

Istockmom My wish for all the mothers I know is to cut yourselves some slack. Seriously, ladies, you are working yourselves to death chasing a phantom of perfect motherhood that is perfect madness.

You want me to show you some studies that say you aren't the only key to school success? Here ya go.

You want me to show research says that all that helicoptering won't do as much as simply providing a  happy home? Here ya go.

You want me to show you some studies that say the fact that you work outside the home has no bearing on how attached your child is? That the real key is how sensitive and emotionally available you are? Here ya go.

How about evidence that you should not be petrified to let your kids out of sight for even a second? Here ya go.

That only leaves the madness of keeping a home running. Far too many women work all day and then do a second shift at home of dinner, cleaning, laundry and baths before collapsing into bed themselves. You'll like this one. It says that studies find that children who do housework with their fathers get along better with their peers because they see cooperation and sharing in practice at home. It also says those marriages are stronger because the no-longer-exhausted mom is actually "in the mood" more often.

So with that in mind, read this essay from the Tranquil Parent that makes the excellent analogy of how the flight attendant always warns you to put the oxygen mask on yourself first. Because if you pass out, you can't help the kids get to safety, now can you? If you aren't taking care of yourself, you won't have much left to give your loved ones.

Happy Mothers Day -- Now go slack off already. Your kids need you to.

-- Sharon Kennedy Wynne


[Last modified: Thursday, May 13, 2010 11:01am]


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