My favorite passage from the mental disintegration that is Francis Ford Coppola's Youth Without Youth goes something like this:

An old guy (Tim Roth) who became a young guy when lightning hit him wants to complete his life's work, tracing the origins of language to "the inarticulate moment of the beginning." he's doing this with a woman who's getting older faster than she should because she's acting like Linda Blair, spouting Sanskrit or something, and making him wiser.

The old/young guy has a doppleganger (also played by Roth, in Coppola's only bow to cohesion), who is telling him to stop grilling the chick about dead languages because she'll die early and he won't score again.

That's when the old/young guy says to... himself, I guess:

"One more regression and we'll reach the proto-language."

Right after that line, the film broke. The three critics attending sat still, thinking it was Coppola doing something demented again. Then we realized it was a genuine malfunction and one critic applauded for the break.

"You fool," I said. "We need only one more regression to reach the proto-language."

Some folks have no respect for science.

Youth Without Youth doesn't have a local opening date yet. Don't blink, or hold your breath. All that cockeyed searching for proto-language Coppola does and it turns out to be: "Yabba dabba doo."