Meet the werewolf weenies of 'New Moon'

APRIL 23, 2009

Or maybe these chiseled, chest-shaven hunks are the opening act/boy toys for Adam Lambert's solo tour after he wins American Idol by default.

No, they're the "Wolf Pack" in the next installment of the moribund -- look it up, tweens -- Twilight movies series, New Moon, arriving too soon in theaters for my tastes. (Actually, Nov. 20.) Right away you see what's wrong with this picture: These creatures won't rip anyone to shreds, just glower them into submission.

Just so we can preserve the memory of this, the only thing in entertainment they'll ever accomplish (Okay, there''s always floor shows at Flirt), welcome from the left: Alex Meraz (Paul), Chaske Spencer (Sam Uley... hey, why does he deserve a surname and the others don't?), Bronson Pelletier (Jared) and Kiowa Gordon (Embry).

And now, we rejoin your lives, in progress.

(Photo: Summit Entertainment/James White)

Posted by at 7:22:41 am on April 23, 2009 in

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For new movie reviews and movie news, this blog's for you. Steve Persall, movie critic for the St. Petersburg Times, weighs in on blockbuster movies, small-budget movies, the best movies, the worst movies ever and everything in between. Steve was conceived behind a drive-in movie theater his father operated and raised in projection booths and concession stands. He doesn't care how you did it up north.

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