Wednesday night on American Idol: Tears, self-loathing and all-out sobbing
fits. And that's just from Idol's producers who must have turned over
the show's direction and Ford commercial ideas to a Cub Scout troop. (Water balloons? Really?)

In
the end, "Big Oil" Michael Sarver and dye-queens Allison Iraheta and
Alexis Grace were sitting on the three stools of shame.

"I shamefully admit I
had a dream that Ryan [Seacrest] said tonight would be a 'shocker.' I
woke up weeping," PiScene confessed during the live chat.

Save
the tears for tonight's reject: Alexis had a good chance of getting the
judges' reprieve, but her scratchy reprise of Jolene impressed nobody. The only way she's catching this year's Idol tour is as a
ticket-holder.