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Torche guitarist treated for rabies after bat urinates in eye; tonight's show at Crowbar still on

5

April

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Get ready for a story that's the literal definition of the phrase "bats--- insane."

In one of the metal-est power moves of this or any other decade, guitarist Andrew Elstner, of Miami indie-metal group Torche -- who are scheduled to kick off a run of southeastern shows on Thursday at Crowbar in Ybor City -- is being treated for rabies after a bat urinated in his eye.

According to Pitchfork ("America's source for indie music/bat urine news since 1995"), Elstner was staying with friends at a 188-year-old home in St. Louis when he found a trapped, frightened bat in one room. "As it passed by my head a fourth time at light speed, it managed to piss on my right eye," Elstner told Pitchfork. The guitarist laughed it off, because what's a little bat urine in the socket every now and then? Hell, Ozzy Osbourne bit the head off a bat, and he looks like a million bucks!

But it's all fun and games until someone catches rabies. And that, everyone told Elstner, was something that actually, seriously, honestly could happen. Even "nerds at the CDC" told him so. So he went into the emergency room to undergo treatment. "Feel like I'm getting treated for a unicorn bite," he wrote on Facebook, according to Pitchfork. "I didn't feel like rolling the dice any more than I already do."

On their Facebook page, Torche responded with a casual, "Who's got a cool eye patch for Andrew?" Boy, are they coming to the right town.

Promoters say Thursday's show is still a go, and Elstner is scheduled to be there. It'll take place at 9 p.m. Thursday at Crowbar, with Palantine and Feral Babies opening. Tickets are $9-$12. Click here for details. It should be a great show, as we've seen Torche before, and they're wicked.

But cut Elstner some slack if he misses a chord here or there. YOU try rocking out with bat pee in your eye. It ain't easy.

-- Jay Cridlin, tbt*

[Last modified: Thursday, April 5, 2012 1:40pm]

    

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