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9 things people in Florida do when it gets not hot

These are manatees in Crystal River trying to stay warm.

CHRIS ZUPPA | Times

These are manatees in Crystal River trying to stay warm.

7

January

It was cold last night. It'll be cold tonight too. It's not cold down here the way it's cold everywhere else. Our polar vortex is just a bit of a nuisance. Outside in the middle of the day today it actually felt kind of nice. Still, though, we're not used to this kind of thing -- high temperatures that start with a 4! -- lows that start with a 3! -- and so we make a big deal out of it. Also these things:

1. Bust out space heaters.

2. Dodge falling iguanas.

3. Pray for fruit.

4. Watch out for sinkholes!

5. Wear -- cue Stephanie Hayes here -- the flimsy windbreaker we bought for the pirate cruise out of Clearwater Beach and three pairs of threadbare socks.

6. Find stunned-stiff sea turtles.

7. Cancel a boozy monthly event most locals avoid anyway.

8. Argue again over whether what fell out of the sky in 1989 was actually snow.

9. And at least in 1977 -- no doubt that year -- take giddy snapshots of scrawny snowmen.

[Last modified: Tuesday, January 7, 2014 4:36pm]

    

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