On TV this week
90210, 8 p.m., CW Snoop Dogg shows up to give all the suburban yuppies' kids a thrill, and AnnaLynne McCord wears a Na'vi costume, a la Avatar. Need a third reason to watch? Why?
Outrageous Kid Parties, 9:30 p.m., TLC A woman wants her 8-year-old son to have a pirate party, but his stepmother wants it to be a disco party. Gee, let's see which one is the better idea.
Hawaii Five-0, 10 p.m., CBS Kelly Hu guest stars, making this the first time we've consciously noticed she was in something since The Scorpion King. That's right, we went that far back.
No Ordinary Family, 8 p.m., ABC Lucy Lawless and Tricia Helfer in the same episode? All the comic-book nerds in the country just lost their breath for a second.
American Idol, 8 p.m., Fox This week you get an extra day of Idol, but we don't watch it, anyway, as many of you noted last week when we got the number of semifinalists wrong. Hey, just be glad you're happy with this season's new judges and cut us some slack. You think we can watch all these shows?
Only in America With Larry the Cable Guy, 9 p.m., History What could be more American than a little sex and violence? Larry fires machine guns from a big collection and then takes off his shirt to go swimming with the Weeki Wachee mermaids.
America's Next Top Model, 8 p.m., CW The screechy girls have to do a photo shoot with live bees. Would it be too much to hope they're wearing swimsuits, too?
Mr. Sunshine, 9:30 p.m., ABC We know we should quit comparing Matthew Perry's new show, but this episode is about him trying to get his employees to like him. Dude, Phoebe already said you have to let that go!
Top Chef, 10 p.m., Bravo After Richard Blais made frozen mayonnaise last week, we know all bets were off. More interesting: Did you know Carla used to be a high-fashion runway model? Google it.
SERIES PREMIERE Ice Brigade, 10 p.m., Food A show about ice sculptors. Soorry, but no matter how big and impressive the creations are, you can't eat those.
Fairly Legal, 10 p.m., USA Kate has to defend a soldier against a Homeland Security prosecutor. Is this what we've come to, people? At least Peter MacNicol is back to lawyer shows after a stint on Grey's Anatomy.
Ultimate Factories, 10 p.m., NatGeo Watch why it takes Bentley nine weeks to make its Mulsanne luxury car. Well, for a $285,000 base price, it should take twice that.
42nd NAACP Image Awards, 8 p.m., Fox Pardon us, but any awards show that seriously considers giving awards to Jaden Smith for The Karate Kid and Denzel Washington for The Book of Eli has some fundamental problems.
SERIES PREMIERE Beast Hunter, 9 p.m., NatGeo Forger the Indonesian Man Ape and just get to El Chupacabra, would you? We're still trying to figure that one out.
The Defenders, 8 p.m., CBS Kathy Griffin is a crude comedian who is sued by an audience member who is offended. No, on the show.
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org