On TV this week
Surviving the Holidays With Lewis Black, 8 p.m., History The angriest man in comedy talks with Joy Behar, Bob Saget, David Alan Grier and Craig Ferguson about the meaning of Kwanzaa, the history of Hanukkah and the real St. Nicholas. Something tells us illusions will be shattered.
Heroes, 8 p.m., NBC H.R.G. hosts a Thanksgiving dinner, but Hiro is still being held hostage. Great, someone else will have to bring the cans of Ocean Spray cranberries.
Accidentally on Purpose, 8:30 p.m., CBS This episode focuses on newspaper arts and entertainment coverage, something we're sorta familiar with, as James hires another film critic. That's how you know this show is make-believe.
90210, 8 p.m., CW Now that Tristan Wilds apparently is dating Rihanna or something, we have to watch this week's episode to see what Dixon is all about. Oh, and other stuff happens, too.
The Biggest Loser, 8 p.m., NBC The five survivors get a visit from Suze Orman about finances and former NFL star Rod Woodson runs a challenge. We don't know which one would tire us out more.
Explorer, 10 p.m., NatGeo Scientists recreate what would happen if a 6-mile-wide asteroid hit the Earth. It can't be all that bad, because we're all still here.
The Biggest Loser, 8 p.m., NBC That's right, more of this show, as more than 40 former contestants give us updates on what happened after they left the show. We doubt they all kept in contact with Jillian.
Criminal Minds, 9 p.m., CBS The 100th episode features Joe Mantegna trying to find C. Thomas Howell, which is the most improbable sentence we've written in weeks.
CSI: NY, 10 p.m., CBS That multi-episode arc in which Gary Sinise tries to locate Skeet Ulrich and his victims comes to an end. Scratch that, this is the most improbable sentence we've written in weeks.
Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, 9 a.m., NBC Andrea Bocelli, Boys Like Girls, Alan Cumming, Jimmy Fallon and the Roots, Gloria Gaynor and Carly Simon all join the Today show folks for the 83rd running of the floats.
The Thanksgiving Day Parade on CBS, 9 a.m., CBS Meanwhile, the folks from The Early Show try to keep up with NBC, but we know a knockoff when we see it.
A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving, 8 p.m., ABC A heartwarming tale of a group of kids whose neglectful parents leave them in the care of an egotistical dog that serves them popcorn and jelly beans for dinner.
The Godfather, 8 p.m., AMC A subtle reminder that spending the day with your family could have much worse repercussions.
Ghost Whisperer, 8 p.m., CBS Can't Melinda even take a cruise without some deadhead bugging her? Guess not.
Platinum Babies, 9 p.m., WE A rich couple have been trying for years to have a baby, so they think they get to blow twice as much money when they have twins. Hey, you coulda got a whole posse of foster kids for that $40,000, ya mooks.
Hoover Dam Reinvented, 10 p.m., NatGeo Because we're about as close to the Great Depression as we're likely gonna get (cross your fingers, this is the worst it's going to be), engineers look at how they'd construct the Hoover Dam if they tried to do it today. First tip: Don't try to build a megalopolis in the middle of the high desert.
— Joshua Gillin email@example.com