On TV this week
Greek, 9 p.m., ABC Family Dale and Calvin take Rusty to Comic-Con to get his mind off Jordan. Because hanging around nerdy losers with no girlfriends — and realizing you're one of them — is just what will make you feel better in that situation.
The Big Bang Theory, 9:30 p.m., CBS Raj faces deportation if he can't find a job. The irony here is, if he gets deported, he'll get some job an American company outsourced.
CSI: Miami, 10 p.m., CBS Miami's most hated man gets murdered. Why bother investigating?
Bizarre Dinosaurs, 8 p.m., NatGeo Mamenchiasaurus and Parasaurolophus are bizarre in that they both are triple-digit word scores in Scrabble and manage to sound like Godzilla rivals.
The Biggest Loser, 8 p.m., NBC A challenge winner gets to divide the contestants into two teams. We recommend the names "Large" and "Extra-Large."
Explorer, 10 p.m., NatGeo There's a pretty sinister history behind the gold trade — such as what made human beings suddenly decide they liked shiny yellow metal.
America's Next Top Model, 8 p.m., CW It's the go-see episode already, and it's augmented by a martial arts-themed photo shoot. Rejection and cultural ignorance in the same episode? Tyra's really turning up the heat.
Top Chef: Las Vegas, 10 p.m., Bravo We're still reeling from how Jennifer complained all last week about how she was sick, and then what does she do after winning $10,000? Kiss the judge. Gee, thanks.
SERIES PREMIERE Alaska State Troopers, 10 p.m., NatGeo It's like cops in Alaska, where the thin blue line arrests rapists, crank dealers and members of Sarah Palin's family.
FlashForward, 8 p.m., ABC So this is what all those Lost fans are talking about. We can finally lord it over people who aren't in the know by saying things like "What do the dead crows mean?" and "What happens to Agent Noh?" Yeah, that feels pretty good.
The Vampire Diaries, 8 p.m., CW Meanwhile, we have no idea what's going on here. Is it like Twilight or what? Well, we didn't read those, either.
SEASON PREMIERE 30 Rock, 9:30 p.m., NBC Jack has to deal with the economy and Liz is suddenly famous. We watch TV to escape, y'all; please quit putting real-life stuff in your shows.
Day of the Dead, 8 p.m., TMC Even though it's about 1,000 degrees outside, it is October, so that means scary movies. Well, zombies, at least. Here's the remake of George A. Romero's third flesheater flick. You know, the one about the people in the bunker. At least the original had scenes in Fort Myers.
Dog Whisperer, 9 p.m., NatGeo A woman begs Cesar for help because her lab-mastiff mix is pretty goldarn vicious. Start by not naming the thing Cujo, okay?
SERIES PREMIERE Lobstermen, 10 p.m., Discovery We've had crab fisherman and swordfish fisherman. Now here's one about lobster fisherman. We get it: bad weather, long days, freezing cold. But mmmm boy, Red Lobster is having a special on one-pounders!
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org