On TV this week
NFL Football, 8:30 p.m., ESPN Jets-Dolphins. Because it's Monday.
Hawaii Five-0, 10 p.m., CBS Wow, Grace Park and guest star Reiko Aylesworth in the same episode? The geeks will freak with the hotness from Battlestar Galactica and 24 colliding.
Sing Your Song, 10 p.m., HBO A biopic of Harry Belafonte, a singer so ubiquitous in pop culture that we often forget how many color barriers he broke.
SERIES PREMIERE Bachelorette Party: Las Vegas, 10 p.m., Oxygen A new reality series following bachelorette parties, because they have yet to learn no evidence of those celebrations should be kept. In this episode, rapper Too Short is "seduced" by a bridesmaid. Sure he is.
90210, 8 p.m., CW American Idol contestant Kellie Pickler visits as a — surprise! — contestant on a talent show competing against Naomi. Who will win???
SERIES PREMIERE Man Up!, 8: 30 p.m., ABC Three doughy Gen Xers reach their midlife crises, with a dad, a divorcee and a singleton all bemoaning their lot in life. It should be obvious among the three of you that hey, there's no winning the game of life, just playing your position.
Chopped, 10 p.m., Food Yay, Halloween shows! This time the chefs have to make a meal out of chicken feet. That's hardly what our Vietnamese mother-in-law or Midwestern grandmother would call exotic.
Top Shot, 10 p.m., History The final five must fire a semiautomatic pistol while moving through the air upside down. How dangerous can they make it? Light them on fire, maybe?
2011 World Series, 7:30 p.m., Fox Baseball? What? Sorry, baseball ended two weeks ago around here.
Flight of the Living Dead: Outbreak on a Plane. 8 p.m., AMC 'Tis the season for cheesy horror movies about assorted terrors on various modes of transportation.
America's Next Top Model, 9 p.m., CW The contestants must play flag football with pro football players. Or just tie the models to the ballplayer's belts and make them the flags. Either way.
SERIES PREMIERE American Hoggers, 10 p.m., A&E A Texas family's jobs are to help people dealing with the terror of feral hogs. That reminds us of an old Australian movie called Razorback. Anyone? Anyone?
Murder in the Roman Empire, 8 p.m., NatGeo Smart types look into who may have killed a 10-year-old near Hadrian's Wall in the year 213 A.D. Well, there was probably a lot of killing around there back then.
Whitney, 9:30 p.m., NBC Whitney gives Alex the silent treatment, but gets all upset when she finds out he likes not being talked to. Shhhh! You're giving away all our secrets!
SEASON PREMIERE Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team, 10 p.m., CMT It's all tight tops and short-shorts again. Remember when the Cowboys were the only ones who did that? Good thing those days are over.
SEASON PREMIERE Gigolos, 11 p.m., Showtime All the other male escorts forgot it was Steve's birthday, so they try to make up for it. We doubt it's with a nice, quiet evening at home with classical music and a book.
SERIES PREMIERE Casino Wars, 8 p.m., NatGeo A reality series showing how casinos combat cheaters. You know, so you're sympathetic to the businesses that have flashy machines, weighted table games and quick draw dealers that suck up billions of retiree dollars every year.
SEASON PREMIERE 20/20, 10 p.m., ABC As reliable as the tides, the newsmagazine returns for another year.
SERIES PREMIERE My Extreme Animal Phobia, 10 p.m., Animal Planet A psychologist tries to help people overcome their ridiculous fears of bats, roaches, rats and so forth. But spiders? Oh man, get those things away from us.
SEASON FINALE Strike Back, 10 p.m., Cinemax Will Scott and Stonebridge stop terrorists from blowing up a summit in Budapest? And will there be another season of this show?
SERIES PREMIERE Boss, 10 p.m., Starz Kelsey Grammer channels Richard Daley as a Chicago mayor who destroys his enemies and secures unbridled power. Mike Royko woulda loved it.
— Joshua Gillin email@example.com