On TV this week
My Trip to Al-Qaeda, 9 p.m., HBO Pulitzer Prize winner Lawrence Wright's documentary tried to understand Islamic terrorism. When you figure it out, let us know.
SEASON PREMIERE Sons of Anarchy, 10 p.m., FX Jax deals with Abel's kidnapping while Gemma finds out some bizarre news from her past. Who knew she was the voice of Leela on Futurama?
SEASON PREMIERE Rehab: Party at the Hard Rock Hotel, 10 p.m., TRUtv You'd think the first rule of celebrities would be not to attend pool parties in Las Vegas.
SEASON FINALE Louie, 11:30 p.m., FX Louis C.K. decides to go out for the night. Hey, what could happen?
SEASON PREMIERE America's Next Top Model, 8 p.m., CW Fourteen annoying teenagers try to win a modeling contract and never be heard from again. Our patience is wearing about as thin as the sticks they get for this show.
SERIES PREMIERE Hellcats, 9 p.m., CW A law student tries to get a cheerleading scholarship at her university to stay in school after her financial aid falls through. Way to break those stereotypes, CW writers!
SEASON PREMIERE Inside the NFL, 9 p.m., Showtime It's almost NFL time for real! Let's listen to Warren Sapp preview every game and make fun of Phil Simms.
SEASON FINALE Top Chef, 10 p.m., Bravo Frankly, we quit caring when they voted off Tiffany last week.
SERIES PREMIERE Terriers, 10 p.m., FX An ex-cop and his deadbeat friend do unlicensed private detective work. What could go wrong?
SEASON PREMIERE Black Gold, 10 p.m., TRUtv We're all pretty sympathetic to oil rig workers these days, aren't we? Aren't we?
NFL Football, 8:30 p.m., NBC Let's watch the Minnesota Vikings try to defend bringing back Brett Favre while the New Orleans Saints try to keep him down South by breaking his legs. Ah, football!
SERIES PREMIERE Nikita, 9 p.m., CW With La Femme Nikita being remade so many times, it's a little shocking the CW dares to call this show new, but at least they have Maggie Q to make it interesting.
SEASON PREMIERE Destination Truth, 9 p.m., SyFy The team heads to Pompeii to conduct experiments to find out if there are ghosts in the town's ruins. No, but there are plenty of plaster casts of dead people.
MINISERIES PREMIERE Beast Legends, 10 p.m., SyFy A surgeon, an anthropologist, a museum curator and a comic book artist try to recreate what mythical beasts would have actually looked like. Guess what? They're mythical, so they would have looked like whatever you wanted them to. Tonight: the Kraken.
Stand Up to Cancer, 8 p.m., CBS, NBC, ABC, Fox, other channels News anchors Katie Couric, Diane Sawyer and Brian Williams host an infomercial about the big C. Got any money?
Ghost Adventures, 9 p.m., Travel The Season premiere is next week, so the team discusses some of the equipment they use on the show during their investigations. Which machine adds the laugh track?
SEASON PREMIERE Martin Lawrence Presents 1st Amendment Standup, 11 p.m., Starz Comedian Sheryl Underwood is the new host for the fifth season of this standup show. Because by 11 p.m. on a Friday, we need a good laugh.
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org