On TV this weekend
Last Man Standing, 8 p.m., ABC Mike learns the first rule of being the father of a pretty teenage girl: If you like her boyfriend, she will quickly lose interest in him.
SERIES PREMIERE The Job, 8 p.m., CBS Candidates compete for real jobs with companies like Cosmopolitan magazine, Major League Soccer and Live Nation. Unemployment has been so high for so long, we've inevitably turned it into a game show.
SEASON PREMIERE Touch, 8 p.m., Fox Because it was getting harder and harder to find locations that looked like New York, the series officially moves to L.A. to make things easier. The kid actor still doesn't get to talk, and Kiefer Sutherland still gets to make references from some apparently shameful career as a journalist.
SERIES PREMIERE The Jenny McCarthy Show, 10:30 p.m., VH1 Having the former Playmate of the Year host her own talk show reinforces VH1's target demographic of people old enough to remember the Reagan administration. In the first episode, she'll likely come to the realization that the sailor she kissed on New Year's Eve had no idea who she was.
Be My Valentine, 9 p.m., Hallmark Billy Baldwin doesn't want a girlfriend. Too bad he fulfills the triple fantasy of being a firefighter, a single father and a Baldwin.
SERIES PREMIERE Odd Folks Home, 9:30 p.m., Science Ever wonder what the people from Oddities do at home? Yeah, so did the folks at the Science Channel.
Saturday Night Live, 11:30 p.m., NBC Justin Bieber is both the musical guest and the host of tonight's episode, sure to include references of chromed sports cars, Top 40 radio and Selena Gomez. Too bad Justin Bieber has to be on it.
The 55th Annual Grammy Awards, 8 p.m., CBS With this year's dress code, the only reason to watch is to see who breaks it. C'mooooon, Katy Perry! For more, read The Juice* on Page 70.
BAFTA Film Awards 2013, 8 p.m., BBC America The British version of the Oscars, in case you've been wondering what other good movies you've been missing.
Battlestar Galactica: Blood & Chrome, 9 p.m., SyFy For people who don't watch Web-only series, SyFy has thrown you a bone and made this prequel a TV movie. How is it? Let's just say it's difficult to catch that lightning in another bottle.
The Walking Dead, 9 p.m., AMC We're back to the Land That Hope Forgot in what has proven to be a delicious resurgence following last season's snorefest. Will the new folks at the prison cause problems? Will the Governor want an eye for an eye? Will Rick continue to go crazy? Will Merle and Daryl escape? Do we want them to? Yes to all, please.
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org