On TV this weekend
Human Target, 8 p.m., Fox If Indira Varma asked us to come out of retirement to help protect her, we'd jump at the chance, just like Chance does.
Supernatural, 9 p.m., CW On a show this twisted, you know a storyline involving orphans is going to be plenty twisted.
SERIES PREMIERE Teach: Tony Danza, 10 p.m., A&E That this guy gets a job as high school English teacher seems ridiculous, until you realize it's in a school in Philadelphia. Now it makes all kinds of sense. He'll probably be teacher of the year.
SERIES DEBUT The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret, 10 p.m., IFC David Cross is back, this time with Will Arnett. Now we don't even care about the plot.
SERIES PREMIERE Planet Sheen, 11 p.m., Nickelodeon The Jimmy Neutron kid gets a show. Don't worry, your children know.
SERIES PREMIERE Rachel Ray's Week in a Day, 3 p.m., Cooking Rach tries to make five weeknight meals in one day. What, cold cereal and frozen pizza don't count?
Farm Aid, 6 p.m., DirectTV Kenny Chesney, Norah Jones, Jason Mraz, Neil Young, Willie Nelson and the Dave Matthews Band show up for the annual concert, because farmers apparently still need aid.
Saturday Night Live, 11:30 p.m., NBC Breaking Bad's Bryan Cranston is the host, which is much more interesting than last week's sub-par Amy Poehler appearance.
SEASON PREMIERE American Dad, 9:30 p.m., Fox There's been 100 episodes, huh? They really shouldn't include all the storylines adapted from Family Guy in that total.
Wallander II, 9 p.m., PBS Kenneth Branagh stars as the Scandanavian detective again. He needs to really keep an eye out for Lisbeth Salander.
Desperate Housewives, 9 p.m., ABC This thing between Marcia Cross and Brian Austin Green is really kinda creeping us out. It's like the old Melrose Place and Beverly Hills 90210 grew up and got even stranger.
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org