On TV this weekend
Girl vs. Monster, 8 p.m., Disney Olivia Holt from Kickin' It plays a 15-year-old who pretty much acts out the storyline from the first Harry Potter book, except with monster hunting instead of magic. There's a lot of singing, though.
SEASON FINALE Strike Back, 10 p.m., Cinemax Scott has to interrogate Bryant to find out whether she helped Knox. Time's a-wastin' finding those nukes, you know.
SEASON FINALE Cheer, 10 p.m., CMT The kids from Jersey come to Florida for the cheerleading world championships. Will they win it all? Tough to say, on a reality show. Yes, maybe?
MINISERIES FINALE Titanic: Blood and Steel, 8:48 p.m., Encore Spoiler alert: The damn ship sinks.
American Horror House, 9 p.m., Syfy Morgan Fairchild is a sorority housemother who harvests the souls of comely coed pledges. How is that different from a real sorority again?
Saturday Night Live, 11:30 p.m., NBC Christina Applegate hosts to let us all know it's perfectly cool to make double mastectomy jokes on SNL. The formula is tragedy plus time, people.
The First Graduating Class: Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls, 9 p.m., OWN Oprah not only toots her own horn for getting these girls through school, she also gets the tear-jerker award for having some of the students tell their sob stories. And you will sob.
SEASON PREMIERE The Walking Dead, 9 p.m., AMC Last season the show was split between a yammer-happy first half and a blood-spattered second half. You guess which one fans liked more. Hold your breath and see if the show follows the comic book's horrific prison story arc to its conclusion, or decides not to make all its viewers feel like committing suicide.
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org