On TV this weekend
Stand Up to Cancer, 8 p.m., CBS, NBC, ABC, Fox, other channels News anchors Katie Couric, Diane Sawyer and Brian Williams host an infomercial about the Big C. Got any money?
Ghost Adventures, 9 p.m., Travel The season premiere is next week, so the team discusses some of the equipment they use on the show during their investigations. Which machine adds the laugh track?
SEASON PREMIERE Martin Lawrence Presents 1st Amendment Standup, 11 p.m., Starz Comedian Sheryl Underwood is the new host for the fifth season of this stand-up show. Because by 11 p.m. on a Friday, we need a good laugh.
SEASON PREMIERE Cops, 8 p.m., Fox Celebrate 800 episodes of secretly hoping you see your redneck neighbor on this show.
SEASON PREMIERE America's Most Wanted, 9 p.m., Fox Twenty-four whole seasons of this classic series about being afraid to go outside. Thanks for keeping up the crime rate, felons of the world.
Mandrake, 9 p.m., SyFy A half-plant, half-animal beast wants to suck two hours of life away from you. And here we thought Stephen Baldwin's Earthstorm was as bad as it got.
2010 MTV Video Music Awards, 9 p.m., MTV Chelsea Handler will try her best to keep people from booing Kanye West when he shows up, hopefully to apologize to Taylor Swift and not saying anything to Lady Gaga, who is likely to win something because she was nominated 13 times.
SEASON FINALE True Blood, 9 p.m., HBO Sookie wants to get rid of both Bill and Eric. Maybe they'd be happier together, anyway.
SEASON FINALE My Boys, 10:30 p.m., TBS P.J. may finally get her own column. The editors of tbt* are probably looking for new guy to write The Juice* …
SEASON PREMIERE The Venture Bros., 11:30 p.m., Cartoon Well, it's really only the second half of this season, but it's been gone for a while, since it's the only cartoon on Adult Swim drawn by hand anymore. But hey, the geeks are stoked anyway.
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org