On TV tonight
The Vampire Diaries, 8 p.m., CW What do you get someone for their 162nd birthday? We believe that's way past the platinum scale of gift-giving.
FlashForward, 8 p.m., ABC Demetri finally tells his fiancee that he didn't have a flashback. Didn't she just read about it on the Mosaic Web site like everyone else?
Parks and Recreation, 8:30 p.m., NBC Megan Mullally from Will & Grace shows up as Ron's ex-wife. The trivial footnote that Mullally is actor Nick Offerman's actual wife is much more interesting.
SEASON PREMIERE The Real Housewives of Orange County, 10 p.m., Bravo Atlana's over and New York hasn't started yet, so let's go back for a fifth helping of the original O.C. coven, if you dare.
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org