On TV tonight
SEASON PREMIERE Pretty Little Liars, 8 p.m., ABC Family Aria, Emily, Hanna and Spencer need to get some help. Surely, someone in Rosewood will lend a hand.
SEASON PREMIERE Cupcake Wars, 8 p.m., Food The contestants are going to celebrate the Kentucky Derby by making cupcakes inspired by Southern cocktails. Great, there will be four different mint-julep cupcakes.
SERIES PREMIERE The Nine Lives of Chloe King, 9 p.m., ABC Family A teenager has feline powers. We know teens can get catty, but this is ridiculous.
SEASON PREMIERE Memphis Beat, 9 p.m., TNT Stop me if you've heard this one before: The protagonists are a streetwise loose-cannon police officer and the young beat cop who idolizes him. Pretty original, huh?
SEASON PREMIERE Gene Simmons Family Jewels, 10 p.m., A&E Shannon Tweed considers leaving Gene in the first episode. Kinda jumping the gun after 27 years together.
SEASON PREMIERE After the Catch, 10 p.m., Discovery The Deadliest Catch guys hang out in Hawaii with Mike Rowe. Because it gets cold up in the Arctic.
SEASON PREMIERE HawthoRNe, 10 p.m., TNT Marc Anthony is back full-time trying to arrest Jada Pinkett Smith. There's only room for one freaky diva in Mark's life, after all.
— Joshua Gillin firstname.lastname@example.org