On TV tonight
Extreme Weight Loss, 8 p.m., ABC A 23-year-old loses an arm in a car crash and gains a lot of weight. We would joke about him already experiencing some extreme weight loss, but that would be a reach.
Betty White's Off Their Rockers, 8:30 p.m., NBC More oldsters continue to commit pranks, like pretending there's still a "prime time" and that everyone watches network television. Say, what's on Amazon Prime tonight? ANYTHING WE WANT.
SEASON PREMIERE Rizzoli & Isles, 9 p.m., TNT A young journalism student is killed. Surprisingly, it's not by the job market.
SEASON PREMIERE Perception, 10 p.m., TNT Geez, Daniel, we know it's really hard to walk away from Kelly Rowan, but if you ever want to date Kelly Rowan, you'll have to ditch her. That's the way your schizophrenia works, you know.
— Joshua Gillin email@example.com