My oldest daughter has discovered AC/DC. This is partially my fault. Okay, this is totally my fault. Kid Lulu (all 6 years of her) and I were in the car, listening to the radio, when Angus & Co. erupted through the speakers. What was the song? Promise you won't call social services?
Highway to Hell.
Now, I've heard the 1979 classic approximately 2 billion times, which is probably why I failed to immediately recognize its inappropriateness for the ears of a young, impressionable lass. In fact, not until I looked into the back seat and saw Lulu with a furious fist in the air, shouting at the top of her wee lungs, "I'm on the highway to hell!" did I snap off the radio and gently say, "I'll pay you a thousand dollars if you don't tell your mother about this." But by then, Lu was hooked. "Who is this, Daddy?"
And really now: How could I not fill her in on the life-affirming joys of AC/DC?
A few days later, I took Lu and her little sister Mai-Mai to Party City to buy Halloween costumes. Lu took her time, perusing the wall of rather saucy get-ups until finally finding her choice.
"I want to be a devil! Just like AC/DC! Highway to hell!"
The next day, Mai-Mai, all two years of her, was talking to her mom about Village Day, which is what my baby's Christian-school daycare does in lieu of recognizing Halloween. Kids dress up in occupational togs — firemen, ballerinas. No superheroes or Disney princesses in the House of God. So Mai-Mai's mother, trying to cobble together some sort of get-up for her youngest daughter, asked her: What do you want to be when you grow up, honey?
To which Mai replied: "THE DEVIL!"
Sooooo: In honor of my demonic spawn, I present this year's Ultimate Halloween Playlist, fortified with all new Satanism for 2010. Now go fire up the iTunes, all you lil' hellions. And have a Happy Halloween!
40. Blood on the Dance Floor, Michael Jackson
39. Weird Science, Oingo Boingo
38. Tubular Bells, Mike Oldfield
37. Shakin' Shakin' Shakes, Los Lobos
36. Dude (Looks Like a Lady), Aerosmith
35. House of Fun, Madness
34. Somebody's Watching Me, Rockwell
33. Zombie Graveyard Party, Be Your Own Pet
32. Hard Candy, Counting Crows
31. Disturbia, Rihanna
30. Enter Sandman, Metallica
29. Highway to Hell, AC/DC
28. Devil Inside, INXS
27. Runnin' With the Devil, Van Halen
26. Candyman, Christina Aguilera
25. The Headless Horseman, Bing Crosby
24. The Addams Family, Vic Mizzy
23. Zombie Zoo, Tom Petty
22. Trick or Treat, Otis Redding
21. Don't Fear the Reaper, Blue Oyster Cult
20. Toccata and Fugue in D minor, J.S. Bach
19. Pet Sematary, the Ramones
18. Mr. Sandman, the Chordettes
17. (You're the) Devil in Disguise, Elvis Presley
16. Witchcraft, Frank Sinatra
15. Grim Grinning Ghosts, from Disney's Haunted Mansion
14. The Munsters Theme, Jack Marshall
13. Land of 1000 Dances, Wilson Pickett
12. Welcome to My Nightmare, Alice Cooper
11. I Want Candy, Bow Wow Wow
10. Time Warp, the cast of The Rocky Horror Picture Show
9. Dead Man's Party, Oingo Boingo
8. This Is Halloween, Danny Elfman
7. The Twilight Zone Theme, Marius Constant
6. Werewolves of London, Warren Zevon
5. Bela Lugosi's Dead, Bauhaus
4. I Put a Spell on You, Screamin' Jay Hawkins
3. Halloween Theme: Main Title, John Carpenter
2. Monster Mash, Bobby "Boris" Pickett and the Crypt Kickers
1. Thriller, Michael Jackson
TEASER: For more of Sean Daly's suspect parenting tips, go to Pop Life online at tampabay.com/blogs/poplife.