Sunday, October 21, 2018
Parenting & Relationships

Tell Me About It: Couple’s religious differences are an issue

Coupleís religious differences are an issue

Q: I am agnostic, but my boyfriend is religious. He has recently become more devoted to his religion and is not certain but thinks he will want a union in his faith, which does not allow marriage to a non-adherent.

If we were to compromise and marry outside the church, there would be serious consequences for him (read: excommunication).

We will not ask each other to abandon our beliefs, but I have volunteered to learn more about his faith and explore my options for conversion .?.?. though honestly I doubt this is even possible for me.

Maybe you see an option we have missed?

Convert or Bust?

A: The standard answer for a couple with cultural/religious/political differences is that it can work if both of you believe in making it work, and if itís your priority to.

In this case, though, it sounds not only as if religion is his priority, but also that his priorities are in flux, with religion growing in importance to a degree as yet unknown.

Itís not unthinkable, therefore, that you can convert, and mean it, and still not be religious enough for him to see you as his true partner.

If it will help you make a decision without what-ifs, then, by all means, learn more about his faith and explore your options.

But if what you see isnít something you can embrace fully, then you need to consider that youíd enter a marriage with him with distinctly different ideas of what that marriage means. And thatís a tough obstacle to clear.

The Religious One: In my case, Iím the religious one and my husband is the atheist. For me, the test was when we were asked to give a prepared speech with boilerplate language about faith. My husband absolutely refused to parrot words he disagrees with. I supported his decision fully. Iím proud that he wonít fake belief.

Carolyn: Well said, thank you.

Comments
Is the annual pass worth it? As Disney changes pricing system, we help you decide

Is the annual pass worth it? As Disney changes pricing system, we help you decide

Though costly, annual passes at Disney World, Universal, Busch Gardens and other parks can sometimes be a smarter choice. You just have to know what you’re getting.
Published: 10/19/18

Tell Me About It: Tips for introverts when partners host a party

Q: Iím a borderline extrovert married to a definite introvert. I used to enjoy hosting parties/social events before we got together, but I know heís not a fan and havenít done anything for ages. I also didnít try because we lacked space when we first...
Published: 10/19/18
Riverview Chamber readies for another Trick or Treat Street

Riverview Chamber readies for another Trick or Treat Street

Annual event draws thousands to Riverview High School for seasonal fun
Published: 10/18/18

Tell Me About It: Friendship changes after sister-in-law has a baby

Iíve always had a warm and close relationship with my sister-in-law. Then, she had a baby, and everything changed. She seems to resent me if I talk about things Iím doing for fun. Sheíll say things like, "It must be nice to have that much free time,"...
Published: 10/18/18
Top things to do in Tampa Bay this week: MarineQuest, Dia de los Muertos, Brian Kilmeade and more

Top things to do in Tampa Bay this week: MarineQuest, Dia de los Muertos, Brian Kilmeade and more

Top things to do in Tampa Bay this week: MarineQuest, a Dia de los Muertos celebration and Fox co-host Brian Kilmeade.
Published: 10/17/18
5 things to do under $5 this week: Pops in the Park, Circus McGurkis

5 things to do under $5 this week: Pops in the Park, Circus McGurkis

On our list for Oct. 18-24: Free concerts in the park by the Florida Orchestra, free trolley rides in Ybor and a Native American flute gathering.
Published: 10/17/18

Tell Me About It: Friendís inability to make plans feels like ghosting

Q: A former co-worker/friend moved about an hour away several years ago. We were close, texting, talking multiple times a day. Once she moved, that slowed down to a meal a couple times a year and intermittent texts/calls.Since last year, I have been ...
Published: 10/17/18

Tell Me About It: Momís offer to help with twin newborns is rejected

Q: My son and daughter-in-law are expecting twins, their first children together ó she has older children. My husband and I have enjoyed a warm and happy relationship with them and live nearby.My son is a twin so I am fully aware of the need for extr...
Published: 10/16/18

Tell Me About It: Caring mom takes in sonís friend as part of the family

Q: My sonís best friend since middle school has been living in my guest room for a couple of months now, since his 18th birthday. His home situation has been very unstable for the past few years since his parents split up, and he bounced around their...
Published: 10/15/18
Hillsborough County Fair opens Thursday in Dover with Dollar Day admission

Hillsborough County Fair opens Thursday in Dover with Dollar Day admission

The annual event will include a mix of entertainment, agriculture
Published: 10/13/18
Updated: 10/14/18