Advertisement

Tell Me About It: Thrown off by sudden, no-gift Christmas

 
Published Dec. 6, 2017

Thrown off by sudden, no-gift Christmas

I am meeting part of my family for an early Christmas celebration. Five days out, my cousin e-mails everyone to say she will only be giving a present to her mom and our grandparents. She is skipping our aunt, my mom and me. That is the entire party.

We gave each other small inexpensive gifts last year. I don't know whether they are tight on money or time, or if there is a more selfish reason.

I would be very happy with a card. It also hurts my feelings because I put a lot of thought into her gift and it is already wrapped.

Do I give it to her?

Hurt

A: Reply to her e-mail that you already got her a gift and want her to have it anyway, no reciprocation expected. Say the important thing is that you'll get to be together again in just a few days.

If she pushes back on the gift, then say OK and return it, save it for next year or keep it for yourself.

Spouse's 'compliment' falls flat for wife

Q: I am the primary cook in our house because I enjoy everything about it and my husband does not. I try not to repeat a single recipe within a three-month period. I cook roughly four times a week, and almost every meal takes at least an hour to prepare.

Yet my husband's go-to compliment, when he likes something that isn't especially fancy, is, "I like this, it's nice and simple."

If I were serving tomato soup out of a can, this wouldn't bother me, but it really, really does.

But is it OK to say so?

"Simple" Chef

A: Yes, since it's a lot better than swallowing your resentment.

So own it: "Is there another adjective you can use? This was actually complicated to make."

For what it's worth: This might in fact be his "go-to hint" that he prefers food that's less ... creative.