Monday, November 20, 2017
Parenting & Relationships

Tell Me About It: Wife can’t stop husband’s unhealthy habits

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Wife can’t stop husband’s unhealthy habits

Q: My husband had a heart attack two years ago and nothing we do gets him to eat better. He can eat two bags of chips, a container of ice cream and lots of bread and butter every day when he comes home from work. It is so hard to watch him doing this.

Trying

A: Then I suggest you lay off the attempted corrections and just enjoy him while you have him — and do whatever you can under the circumstances to protect yourself financially for if/when he has another health crisis that either kills him or leaves him disabled.

And keep the bingeables out of the house.

I realize this collectively might be the least welcome advice ever, but I think you have to think of him as a runaway train. And when you can’t stop it, your remaining choices are all about limiting the damage from eventual impact. I’m sorry.

Parent gets flak for supporting adult son

Q: My siblings think I spoil my 26-year-old son. I am not rich but I am secure. My son is trying some entrepreneurial things and money is often tight. I don’t want him to pay for food with his credit card. I give him a few grand here and there, which makes it easier on him, but then I dare not tell my family. .

I think really rich people subsidize their children’s entire lives all the time and that’s called high society. But I’m being called a sucker. Is there a line I shouldn’t cross?

Secure

A: If your son is an ingrate or in any way showing signs of entitlement, then please reduce the cushion.

But if he’s a good kid who appreciates what you do, is trying in earnest to make something of himself — as in, working his butt off and not living the dilettante life — and demonstrates through his life choices that he intends to be a net asset to society, then please feel free to tell your family to stuff it.

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