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He said She said

Does the Material MILF still bring it?

She said

Dave, Madonna is almost 50 and still has a body most women far younger (including this 30-year-old!) would kill for.

More importantly, I suspect a lot of men half her age would kill for a gander or a grab of the Material Girl, too.

That got me thinking about the whole MILF issue.

Watching the new video from her latest album, Hard Candy, Madonna definitely qualifies.

At least, I think she does. Admittedly, I am somewhat perplexed about this MILF phenomenon and hope you can shed some light.

Like, what does it take to be a MILF? Is there some trait or circumstance that can disqualify a woman from MILF-hood? And is there an age cutoff, with some women just being too damn old?

What I wonder most is, why does this attraction even exist? Isn't it kind of bordering on gross?

I mean, even an attractive old man seems more Grandpa than "hot damn!" The salt-and-pepper-haired George Clooney might be the one exception. But for the most part, a guy old enough to be Dad seems wrong on so many levels. I mean, eeww!

So do tell, Dave. Who is on your list of MILFs? And have you ever actually, ahem, engaged with one? Was it all American Pie-like? Or more like American Psycho?

He said

Let me begin with an analogy.

I can pass a 1958 Corvette on the road and get excited by the timeless curves, bright red paint and those distinguishing chrome headlights. It may even look like it just rolled off the showroom floor.

But like Madonna, under the hood, there's an engine that has probably had a lot of work done to it over the years. And that 230-horsepower V-8 beauty that left the assembly line 50 years ago has a hell of a lot of miles on it. No doubt, it's been in the hands of several owners — like Dennis Rodman, who ran it hard and wore it out.

So, I'm staying away.

Although the term MILF wouldn't spring up until decades later, the benchmark for the "older woman/younger man" syndrome can be traced back to The Graduate. Yet Anne Bancroft was all of 36 years old when her character, Mrs. Robinson, seduced young Benjamin Braddock, played by 31-year-old Dustin Hoffman.

But in my opinion, Generation Y one-upped Bancroft with the incredibly sensual Ms. Stifler from American Pie. Jennifer Coolidge was also 36 when she went tantric on Finch.

And to answer your question, yes, I engaged with one.

Don't get me wrong, though. While I'm no Roman Polanski or Roger Clemens, I prefer a lower-mileage make and model.

Does the Material MILF still bring it? 04/30/08 [Last modified: Sunday, May 4, 2008 12:07pm]
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