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Tell Me About It: Boyfriend must level with parents about cohabitation

 
Published Sept. 4, 2014

Q: I'm a 22-year-old in a long-distance relationship. Recently, his parents asked whether we plan on moving in together when we are living in the same city (in a year). His parents are religious and do not approve. We had planned on living together and agree that answering their question honestly is the most respectful option. How can we tell them without offending them or being disrespectful?

Between a Bible and a Hard Place

A: Technically, you're a year away from this hard place. Nothing's certain until you sign a lease, and just because his parents seem to be looking for trouble, that doesn't mean you have to help them find it.

Your boyfriend can set the stage in the meantime, by explaining that your being together is a year away and therefore premature to discuss, but that, for the record, he does not share their disapproval of cohabitation. His maintaining that this is about him, not you, while they process this would be the kind and mature thing, not to mention shrewd.

Q:

randma" was so mean to her. My nephews, now old enough to understand her words, all want nothing to do with her. Where do I go from here?

A: