Tell Me About It: Boyfriend should accept you for who you are

Q: After multiple relationships not working out because both parties were dishonest in one way or another, I decided to use a new approach to my current relationship. I am 23, met my current boyfriend (also 23) online, and decided to be COMPLETELY HONEST.

This was meant to mostly cover my feelings, as I tended to hold things in unhealthily, but I let it fold over to all aspects, including the disclosure of my sexual history. I have now learned this was a mistake.

This man is all I've ever wanted in a partner. But he can't get past what I've told him; he loves to throw things in my face, such as how I won't try something with him in the bedroom that he knows I did with someone else. How can I help him get past it? Expressing the frustration it causes me has had no effect on the way he acts or speaks about it.

Dirty Dirty Laundry

A: He is the one who has to get past it, and it doesn't sound as if he's trying. If he won't try, then I don't see any other answer than to break up.

I can't speak for you, but "all I've ever wanted in a partner" is someone who accepts me as-is. You don't have that — he's punishing you for who you are. Are, were, same diff, by the way.

Age might be a factor: For every decade of life, people either become more comfortable with the idea of life mileage, or suffer the consequences of sitting in judgment of it. Maybe he's just young and stupid, and will eventually figure out that your life mileage is not about him, but how many cheap shots are you prepared to take from him while you wait for him to grow up.

Tell Me About It: Boyfriend should accept you for who you are 04/18/14 [Last modified: Wednesday, April 16, 2014 3:55pm]

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