Sunday, February 18, 2018
Parenting & Relationships

Tell Me About It: Dealing with friends who have fallen out

Q: Do you have any tips on how to navigate relationships with two friends who've stopped speaking to each other? I'm still friends with both. I spend more time with one, but actually tend to think he's more at fault in the falling out.

Should I completely butt out?

Friend

A: I think it makes the most sense to stay friends with each as if neither is friends with the other, period — as in, treat it as a "what" and not a "why." If you're ever unsure which one to invite to something, then invite both and let them sort it out.

In the event the "why" becomes an issue, though, it's fine to express your opinion, as long as you're careful to acknowledge the limits of what you know.

That is, unless you witnessed the falling-out event yourself: In that case, you should already have told the more-in-the-wrong friend your opinion of his more-wrongness. That is something we owe our friends — on both sides of a wrong.

Fiance seems to have lost interest in her

Q: I am very much in love with my boyfriend, but it seems he no longer shares those feelings.

When we attended my sister's wedding, we got engaged. I was thrilled, but he's been saying ever since, "Let's give it more time," and refusing to talk any more about it. It's been six years, and he just won't tell me why we're not married.

I'm losing my mind here. I don't want to leave him, but I don't know what I can do when he won't talk to me.

Desperate Bride

A: You can leave.

Why stay? Put yourself in control.

If you agree that "losing (your) mind" = time to go, then just arrange a new place to live. Hurt now so the healing begins.

Comments

Tell Me About It: Vacation opens dialogue about money

Vacation opens dialogue about moneyQ: My girlfriend and I just went on our first vacation together. I thought it went well, but after we were home she told me she felt I had been cheap because I wanted to split all costs 50-50.I think cheap would be ...
Published: 02/16/18
Dance Moms star Chloe Lukasiak to appear at Florida State Fair on Saturday

Dance Moms star Chloe Lukasiak to appear at Florida State Fair on Saturday

TAMPA — Chloe Lukasiak will take on a different role than she is accustomed when she stops by the Florida State Fair this weekend.After all, the 16-year-old Pennsylvania-native and resident rose to fame on Seasons 1 through 4 of Lifetime’s reality te...
Published: 02/15/18

Tell Me About It: Past eating disorder affects food choices

Q: My wife refuses to change her diet and grocery shopping to accommodate my health needs and those of our kids. Everything she gets is processed grains and sugar. My doctor recently recommended losing weight, and exercise won’t cut it. But because s...
Published: 02/15/18
Top things to do this weekend: Florida State Fair, Mutt Derby at Derby Lane

Top things to do this weekend: Florida State Fair, Mutt Derby at Derby Lane

GO, DOG, GO: Mutt DerbyOne of the most hilarious days at the races is Sunday, when ordinary house pets get a chance to run on the Derby Lane greyhound track. Mutt Derby registration begins at 11 a.m., but you can register in advance at greyhoundpets...
Published: 02/14/18
This week’s best concerts: Mary J. Blige, Kelsea Ballerini, Wyclef Jean and more

This week’s best concerts: Mary J. Blige, Kelsea Ballerini, Wyclef Jean and more

LEGEND IN THE MAKING: Kelsea BalleriniComing off a debut with three No. 1 singles — Love Me Like You Mean It, Dibs and Peter Pan — it’s no surprise Kelsea Ballerini was feeling the pressure before dropping her sophomore album Unapologetically last fa...
Published: 02/14/18
5 things to do under $5: Apple's Steve Wozniak, mini golf in the library, Clearwater street parties

5 things to do under $5: Apple's Steve Wozniak, mini golf in the library, Clearwater street parties

1 Steve Wozniak: The Apple co-founder, above, will give a free talk on Tuesday, Feb. 20 as part of USF Muma College of Business’ new Thought Leader series. The college’s dean will conduct a discussion about everything from the need for en...
Published: 02/14/18

Tell Me About It: Girlfriend’s directness often comes off rude

My brother is getting married soon. My serious, but fairly new, girlfriend thinks she’s not been invited because we’re lesbians, but actually I’ve hidden the invite because I don’t want to take her.Thing is, I adore almost everything about her! She’s...
Published: 02/14/18
Why ‘Black Panther’ is revolutionary — and an excellent movie

Why ‘Black Panther’ is revolutionary — and an excellent movie

Like its real-life radical namesakes, Black Panther is revolutionary and Afrocentric, a black cultural fantasy made real in a medium taking too long. Children of any color except white haven’t seen blockbuster movie superheroes that look like them.No...
Published: 02/13/18
Updated: 02/14/18
‘Early Man’ is a throwback in both story and Aardman Studios claymation style

‘Early Man’ is a throwback in both story and Aardman Studios claymation style

Nick Park’s stop-motion clay animation made famous with Wallace & Gromit seems prehistoric in a digital age. That makes it perfectly suited for Early Man, a throwback in both story and Aardman Studios style. Early Man is Park’s first...
Published: 02/13/18

Tell Me About It: Couple should talk rather than assume

Q: My wife has been a freelance consultant whose work has dried up. I have a good-paying job and I figured with her work having dried up, she’d take care of the house, bills, paperwork, etc., with her time. Instead, I don’t know what she does, but th...
Published: 02/13/18