Friday, April 20, 2018
Parenting & Relationships

Tell Me About It: In the end, girlfriend wasn't good enough

Q: My girlfriend and I broke up after two years together. She came from a wealthy background, and I'm from an upper-middle-class family. Despite not being as wealthy, I felt that I made up for that in other areas: I always cooked and cleaned, I paid for many trips and activities together, bought her flowers every two weeks and gave her rides.

Long story short, she started seeing another guy while seeing me. I found out and we broke up.

After three months, we started talking, hashing things out. She told me that her dad never wanted to meet me because I wasn't good enough, and that she started seeing that, too.

I may not be rich, but I do well for myself. I'm finishing school, I have my own place, pay my own bills. I can understand that her dad may think this, he's never met me. But my girlfriend thinks this way now too? Maybe I am just naive, but love should be judged on a person's heart, not their wallet. Am I wrong?

Heartbroken in California

A: You aren't naive to think love should be judged on heart above wallet, no. But you are naive to think this belief applies to her. (Two years, no meeting Dad. Missed sign?) Your girlfriend found someone else, and the rest is just words and justifications and excuses. If she agrees with Daddy about judging you by anything besides your character, then that's deplorable. That she would tell you this is even more so. If instead she doesn't agree with her father but is appeasing him, then that's just weak.

So, yes, do judge love by a person's heart — and see that her heart isn't worthy of yours.

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