Friday, April 20, 2018
Parenting & Relationships

Tell Me About It: It's okay to ask parent to stop with the pet names

Q: I'm an adult who recently moved back home. I'm having a hard time adjusting to the loss of independence. The one thing that really drives me crazy is that almost every time my mom speaks to me, she uses a pet name or a childhood nickname. I'm not financially independent, and I know my parents love me and do so much for me, so I don't want to seem unappreciative. The obvious answer is to just talk to my mom about it, but in past conversations of a similar vein, I could tell she felt hurt by my asking her to treat me as more of an adult. Do you have any suggestions on how to approach this?

Anonymous

A: No. You are an adult asking to be treated as such, so just be direct about your misgivings. "Mom, I love you and I'm grateful to be here. The loss of independence is hard for me, though. One thing I think would help: Would you please not call me by pet names or nicknames? I get this will be an adjustment, but we're both finding our way."

Friend is entitled to her post-divorce bitterness

Q: A friend divorced her husband three years ago. He was verbally abusive and had an affair. Since then, she bashes her husband and men in general. This is making me uncomfortable. How do I tell her to ease off on her opinions, without ignoring her feelings of what she went through?

Uncomfortable

A: It's not your place to tell her to ease off on her opinions. They're hers and she's entitled to them. You, meanwhile, are entitled to yours: "Your ex deserves every bit of your anger, but he's just one man. I expect that if a man publicly bashed all women out of disgust for his ex-wife, you'd be outraged by that."

Comments

Tell Me About It: How to deal with conversation dominators

Q: We have a few relatives, including a sibling, who we don’t see or hear from often, as we are busy or live far away. We meet over a meal or for an hour or so, or at family gatherings requiring a drive, and I am so frustrated that they dominate the ...
Published: 04/19/18
Plan your weekend: Kenny Chesney, ‘The Producers’ in the park, Mainsail Art Fest, Sugar Sand Fest, Earth Day

Plan your weekend: Kenny Chesney, ‘The Producers’ in the park, Mainsail Art Fest, Sugar Sand Fest, Earth Day

The top things to do April 20 to 22 in Tampa, St. Petersburg and the whole Tampa Bay area.
Published: 04/18/18
The newest trend for Tampa date nights? Indoor ax throwing

The newest trend for Tampa date nights? Indoor ax throwing

Axe Throwing Tampa and Raider Axe Lodge are bringing the axe-throwing trend to the Tampa Bay area.
Published: 04/18/18
Top things to do in Tampa Bay: Sugar Sand Festival, Record Store Day, ZooBrews, Beerfest

Top things to do in Tampa Bay: Sugar Sand Festival, Record Store Day, ZooBrews, Beerfest

BEER: ZooBrews and BeerfestAs if we needed any more proof of the craft beer craze, this weekend brings two events with a smorgasbord of samplings. • The newly renamed ZooTampa at Lowry Park is calling ZooBrews a new event that appears to be an awful ...
Published: 04/18/18
Huge concert week in Tampa: Foo Fighters, Kenny Chesney, 98 Rockfest, more

Huge concert week in Tampa: Foo Fighters, Kenny Chesney, 98 Rockfest, more

PURE NIRVANA: Foo FightersDave Grohl may be America’s last unquestioned rock god. He’s played with Kurt Cobain and Jimmy Page, Tom Petty and Trent Reznor and St. Vincent, and he also leads a pretty decent group — perhaps you’ve heard of them — called...
Published: 04/18/18
5 things to do under $5: Taste of Science talks, free ‘Field of Dreams’ screening

5 things to do under $5: Taste of Science talks, free ‘Field of Dreams’ screening

1 Field of Dreams: Kick off baseball season with Tampa Bay Rays mascots and a movie that makes every baseball fan cry. Raymond and DJ Kitty will be at Tampa Theatre for photos and you can join in a Take Me Out to the Ballpark sing-along on the Mighty...
Published: 04/18/18

Tell Me About It: Don’t feel awkward about checking friend

Q: My husband and I adopted a dog that does not like strangers; he is in intensive training and part of that is having strangers over to our house to practice meeting people. I usually invite a friend over after explaining the situation and promising...
Published: 04/18/18

Tell Me About It: Should parents help with daughter’s dog?

Q: About a year and a half ago my husband and I purchased a dog. She was way too busy for us, so my daughter took her. We helped pay to have the dog spayed, as she was ours to start with.Anyway, since then, whenever my daughter takes a trip for a wee...
Published: 04/17/18

Tell Me About It: Boyfriend won’t open up about their future

Q: I have been seriously dating my boyfriend for over two years, and we live together. I have expressed more than once that I want to be married, and that it is something I value and want in life, and we had a lengthy conversation about it a couple m...
Published: 04/16/18

Tell Me About It: Boys’ similar history draws comparisons

Q: My late husband died when our son was 18-months. We always had the basics, I made sure of that, but we both went without a lot of the extras. My son just started college and his random roommate assignment happens to be a boy whose father also died...
Published: 04/15/18