a loaded question
Q: When a woman asks what I think of her new tattoo, how do I respond? Look without looking? Especially when I'm "being a pervert" for looking at her chest. Even if that's where it is.
A: It's just bait, which is generally best not taken (because it gets you involved with baiters). When in doubt: "I think there's no answer that doesn't get me in trouble."
Find a way to acknowledge new in-law's birthday on wedding day
Q: I'm getting married . . . on my future sister-in-law's birthday. She does really love having her special days, so we felt happy she agreed to this day (the only one available at our venue). In any case, I ordered a few dozen cupcakes, and we've got two options: Celebrate beforehand, at a time when her many out-of-town family members likely wouldn't be able to make it, or ask the DJ to pause the music sometime during the reception for us to sing happy birthday to her — at which point her family members will be there, but it might disrupt the flow of the evening. Although weddings always have these disruptions, and the crowd weathers them fine . . . just wanted to know your thoughts.
Minor Wedding Dilemma
A: Pause the music. "Flow" does not trump family goodwill. Though why she didn't take the initiative to say, "Don't worry about my birthday — you have enough going on," and why this is your problem and not her sibling's, I can't imagine.