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Shane Rochester walks into the Dog's Bollocks pub in Ybor City and slaps a sticker on the black polo covering his broad chest. His official number is printed below his name, but it's too small to make an impact, so he takes a pen and writes:
301
He is here for 8MinuteDating, a last-ditch speed-dating effort for singles to find a mate in time for Valentine's Day. People, sorted by numbers they'll record on a card, have paid about $40 to rotate the room. They'll spend eight minutes at a time with a different date, hoping to find one who sticks.
On television above the bar is Gold Rush Alaska, a show about men who brave rushing waters to find a gold morsel. Beside the TV are several signs, one that says Keep Calm and Carry On, and one that says Drink Vodka and Get Drunk.
It could go either way.
• • •
Her sticker says "Alejandra."
"So how do you like it so far?" Shane says.
"It's … different."
"I was thinking of all the little questions to ask. That's so not me. Like, what kind of pets do you like? No."
"You're a good talker," she says.
"I'm in sales."
• • •
Shane is 26, bald as a cue ball and loud. He says "solid" a lot, and he likes to laugh. He wants to get married eventually, but he works long hours for an Internet provider. He travels, and when he's home, he skydives, pores over financial markets online, plays poker or walks to bars blocks from his apartment in Ybor City.
In some ways, the scene is a great way to meet women. In others, it's not.
"Going out and trying to meet someone is hard," he says. "Bars are not the best environment to find Mrs. Right."
Shane tried online dating, but it's hard to tell what you're getting into. He met a woman on dating site, Plenty of Fish, who was lovely and nice, he says. But Shane is on the shorter side and she turned out to be 6 feet 4.
"I felt like I wanted to put on a dog leash and let her walk me down the street," he says between sips of Crown Royal and ginger ale.
He's picky, and has a long mental list describing the perfect woman. She's independent and opinionated and likes to do crazy, adventurous things. She is a couple other things, he says, but … it's too much to get into.
"I think every guy has a conception of a perfect kind of person," he says. "Someone that they lost."
• • •
Her sticker says "Heather."
"Have you been to the beach yet?" he says.
"Of course."
"Have you been to Siesta Key in Sarasota? It's rated the No. 1 beach. It's has the best sand. It's like white baby powder."
• • •
Shane used to be that guy. The one girls call when they had a problem with their boyfriends. He'd open his door and make popcorn and cue up the movie while she cried about loving someone else.
For seven years, he had a friend. He was desperately, deeply in love with her, but he never let her know. Until one day.
"I got up a lot of nerve."
He borrowed his friend's boat and took her out to an island. They had a picnic as the sun settled beneath the shore. They kissed.
"Straight up out of a movie."
Shane was elated. But the next day, he says, she rejected him. And after that, he changed. He realized it was easier to get attention from women if he acted like a jerk, aloof, unavailable.
It's uncomfortable. But do you change back and get rejected again? Is there some middle ground?
"That's what I'm trying to figure out," he says. "I'm in the middle of that."
• • •
Her name tag says "Terri." She is his last date.
"I really want to go backpacking in Colorado," he says.
"Have you ever been to Hawaii?"
"No," he says. "You're the only person I've talked to who has been to all the places I haven't been."
Just as a connection seems to brew, a guy behind the bar picks up a microphone and says, "One minute warning, use your best lines now."
Shane and Terri ignore it and talk for nine minutes rather than eight. They shake hands, and she gets up and he gets up. He shrugs and scrunches his nose and wanders away. He pulls out his cell phone.
"Hey," he says. "We're going to meet up at my place and then head out."
He calls a girl, and invites her out to a club.
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