Editor’s note: The following story contains references to words and language that some may find inappropriate and offensive.
You’ll never get DAMNED.
Same with BAD ASS, KILL and LOL GTFO.
Those were among the personalized license plates that the Florida Department of Highway Safety and Motor Vehicles rejected in 2017.
And don’t even think about submitting tags with more sexually explicit and overtly racist messages, the ones that can’t be published on a family-friendly website.
Florida allows motorists to request personalized license plates — within reason. But every year, some drivers are determined to stretch the bounds of decency and good judgment to see what they can get away with.
The state has a form for those who see their tags as creative outlets. It warns: "Requests with obscene or objectionable words will be rejected."
Most don’t test the rule. A few ignore it. In all, department officials nixed 51 plates last year.
Some of the drivers whose requests were rejected seem preoccupied with the human anatomy. More than 10 made references to male or female genitalia.
Others seemed obsessed with sexual relations.
Among the most creative motorists were those trying to work in a well-known four-letter vulgarity that starts with the letter "f". There were many variations: One tag told of a driver who gives zero fs. One used vulgarity to express disdain for the Islamic State terrorist group, stating simply: F ISIS.
Offended by the vulgarity? Still another driver came up with an f-word variation to explain that they don’t really care about your feelings.
Another expressed utter confusion at the state of today’s world: WTF03.
One person even tried to sneak through the f-word in Italian. Google it. We’re not going to repeat it here.
How about this one: KXKKXXK. It’s likely not a reference to a particular white supremacist group. Instead, internet forums suggest the point was to make it difficult for police officers and others to read the tag.
The form for requesting a personalized license plate has space for second, third and fourth options, so drivers who ask for more than one custom tag don’t have to wait the six to eight weeks to apply again if their top choices are denied.
Standard Florida plates, which support up to eight letters, cost $51.40. Speciality plates, some of which only offer five letters, can run up to $81.40.
Sometimes, though, plates that the state initially approves can be recalled if someone complains to the department.
The state even offers a nifty tool that allows drivers to check tag availability.
Beware: It’s fun and will waste your time.
Contact Josh Solomon at [email protected] Follow @ByJoshSolomon.