Dancer redefines 'almost naked' at Rio Carnival
Brazilian media outlets are very excited about the fact that there is a new record for the smallest article of clothing to be worn in a Carnival parade. Model Dani Sperle showed up at the parade in Rio de Janeiro wearing a headdress, a necklace, boots, armbands ... and a piece of cloth that was 3 centimeters long. For as much coverage as this fact was given, none of the reports specify how she wore this piece of cloth. It broke the record set last year by Viviane Castro at 4 centimeters. Castro was penalized for not meeting minimum standards, though no penalties have been assessed against Sperle yet. Want to make you own Carnival outfit? This column is about 3.5 centimeters wide. Knock yourself out.
Different story is written in snow
People will never learn that it is almost impossible to get away with a crime when there is fresh snow. Police say Sgt. Sid Jackson of the Iowa City police was found drunk in a parked car Saturday. The car was parked in an intersection. Jackson said he was in fact drunk, but had not been driving, according to the Iowa City Press Citizen. The problem with his story was that the car was in the road, and his car's tire tracks were in the fresh snow. So he is likely to have trouble in court.
Deputy makes sure topless bar is safe
Deputy Rick Robbins was just doing his rounds as a snowmobile cop in Kalkaska, Mich., when he stopped in to do some "P.R." work at the Crossroads Saloon, a topless bar, according to the Traverse City Record Eagle. Assuming he means public relations and not some specialized meaning of "P.R.," which could get really funny if we decided to go that way, the Kalkaska sheriff says there is really nothing in the job description that would include a need for Robbins to spend upward of a half-hour in a strip club. He has been suspended. Robbins said the discipline is personal. "I think they just wanted me out of there."
The parking ticket issued to Santa Claus in Brooklyn in November will stand. Chip Cafiero was ticketed for double-parking his Chevy Suburban during a toy delivery run dressed in the familar suit, and had to pay $115. His appeal was denied on Monday, according to the New York Daily News. "I'm surprised the city found Santa guilty," Cafiero said. "The agent saw me handing out toys to kids and walked over and slapped me with a fine anyways. Has this city lost its heart?" He said he will suit up again next season.
Compiled from Times wire services and other sources by staff writer Jim Webster, who can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.