Just having a Sharpie doesn't make you sharp

Dumb criminals

Just having a Sharpie doesn't make you sharp

Police in Carroll, Iowa, say Matthew Allan McNelly, 23, and Joey Lee Miller, 20, were the masked men that tried to break into an apartment, the Daily Times Herald reports. But that they were not masked men in the traditional sense. The theory goes that they didn't have mask masks, but they did have a Sharpie. So they drew masks on their faces with permanent markers. When police found them, it made them particularly easy to identify. In addition to attempted burglary charges, McNelly was charged with driving while intoxicated. Huh. Alcohol was involved. Who would've guessed?

Rabbit ears

Boy's TV habit puts airplanes in peril

Nickie Chamberlain, 12, likes to watch TV in his room, but to get a good picture, he needed to hook up a device to boost the signal. In what one might never have considered a related story, the planes landing at nearby Luton Airport just outside London were reporting a loss of communication with controllers. Engineers traced the signal to the Chamberlain home, and dad Dave, who works at the airport, thought it was a scam when they said they needed to come in and check it out. But once he looked at all the IDs, they went in and followed the beeps which got louder and louder as they closed in on Nickie's room. When they figured out that the $25 booster was causing the problem, they took it and left. "I was upset because I couldn't watch cartoons for a while," Nickie told the Daily Telegraph. "But it's better than causing a plane crash."

ELementary

Hey kids! Don't call this cute number!

Officials at Linda Vista Elementary School in Yorba Linda, Calif., thought it would be nice to make T-shirts for students who participated in a recent jog-a-thon. As part of the text on the shirts, they included a fake 1-800 number that spelled out something cute, reports the Orange County Register. Apparently, they were not aware that there is no such thing as a fake 1-800 number and that virtually any 1-800 number you can think of is probably a phone sex line. Just like the one they used. "It was an innocent mistake," said Rosemary Gladden, school district public information officer. "Parents have been very understanding."

Update

Monroe crypt

Once the auction for the crypt above Marilyn Monroe went and required a deposit, seems like interest went way down. The second attempt to auction off the potentially final resting spot did not attract any bidders. The previous auction did, including a winner at $4.6 million, but no one that would actually pay their bid. Richard Poncher used to think that would be his final resting spot, and was entombed, eh hem, facing Monroe. But wife Elsie decided that moving him was a good way to pay off the mortgage.

Compiled from Times wire services and other sources by staff writer Jim Webster, who can be reached at jwebster@sptimes.com.